Barney

When it comes to autism I swear everything is upside down. That’s the nature of it I suppose.

Things come full circle, they go backwards, you see progress followed by regression.

Things that should make you happy can stab your heart and things that others see as heartbreaking you see as a day in life.

We have finally decided to try medicine for sleep, it didn’t work and made her miserable. Her happiness is not a trade off I’m willing to make. She is back to her self and you can see the difference just by looking at her. She was beginning to go dark and if you know, you know.

If so nice to have her back, to see the relaxed look in her eyes. Don’t get me wrong there is plenty of struggle that goes on, Bad days and hard moments. Autism likes to keep you on your toes.

Generally she is happy, content, her smile is so genuine. Her hugs are back I didn’t even realize they were gone until I got one again.

I checked on her last night. I had her take a sip of water before I went to bed. I peeked at her iPad. She was smiling and laughing, she was watching Barney clips. All these years later and it still brings her joy.

I couldn’t help but smile. Some may find it sad but I don’t. I love how happy it makes her. Her happiness is the most important thing to me.

Autism is confusing, if I didn’t live this life I wouldn’t understand.

There are so many things about autism that take my breath away and some physically hurt my heart.

It’s changed and evolved over the years that’s for sure.

If something makes her happy then I am perfectly fine with it.

choosehope #autism #autismlove

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