More than a caregiver

Moms always have a tremendous pressure on them. It is challenging balancing parenting,marriage, maintaining some kind of order,work if you are able
to and then you add the pressures off keeping up with the other ‘moms’. The moms that post on Pinterest and Facebook who live seemingly perfect lives,have perfect clean houses, and who seem to sail through momming effortlessly. It is no wonder we feel like we are struggling.

Every mom feels overwhelmed and under appreciated at times.

When you parent a child with high needs,that pressure intensifies. When you have a child who requires extra care to function successfully in life, which many times you are unable to provide yourself the feelings of inadequacy doubles.

When it is on you to make sure your child is given their basic rights and that is a constant uphill
Battle. When you are battling with schools,insurance companies, being denied services, put in endless wait lists to try to ensure your child had the best chance,or any chance of success.

When the days are so long and you are in the thick of aggression, self injury. Eloping, meltdowns and you don’t know if you are going to physically and mentally make it through another day, and you look at your child that you love so much and you are filled with immense guilt that could eat you alive. You just want your child to be ok, and for you to be Ok. When that doesn’t feel possible it begins to take a toll.

When all this responsibility falls on you, because you are the mom. The weight at times becomes unbearable. The constant feeling of failure weighs so heavy on you heart.

When you have a child with a disability you become more than a mom, you become a caregiver.

Of course you don’t feel that way, you are the mom
If not you, then who? It’s your instinct to do whatever it’s takes to help your child. To be whatever you need to be to be. You love your child and are fiercely protective.

The reason it is so overwhelming is because you are wearing too many hats, there are too many plates spinning. You become way more than a mom. You are a mom, a therapist, an advocate,a case manager, an educator the list goes on with the more needs your child has.

Many of us are not equipped or qualified for these jobs. You can not be all these people at once. That is why we struggle so much and feel we aren’t doing enough. We need help. Unfortunately a lot of times there is no help available and we have no choice but to step into these roles. Even when you can access help it becomes another job getting them to and from.

It leaves you exhausted, mentally drained and feeling bad about yourself as a mom.

You are more than a mom , you are more than a caregiver.

You are a beautiful person and the reason you feel this way is because you are an amazing mom who has taken on too many roles. You can’t possibly be successful in all of them.

You need take time to to just love your baby, to smile, to feel the sun.

And remember you are enough

autism #fcvblogsquad #morethanacaregiver #asd

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