When me and my husband got married Alyssa was 5 . She had gotten over the hump of the worst and most difficult times but was still pretty challenging . You never knew what could trigger a melt down , cause her to bolt or anything in between .
But I really wanted her to be my flower girl . I knew it might be a disaster but I wanted to try . Some thought we were crazy because honestly it was going to be an extraordinary challenge to even get her in a dress . To think she could handle walking down an aisle in a church no less was almost ludicrous . But I didn’t care I was going try ..
You see the thing with autism is you have to try and a lot of times it’s gets the best of us . It’s scary and overwhelming . It can be frustrating, embarrassing and down right heart breaking . But the successes are the best thing ! It’s feeling true happiness , relief and so much love all rolled into to one .
Unfortunately you need to go through a lot of fails in order to get the successes , I won’t lie sometimes it’s a down right disaster .
The exposure is everything it helps them so much .
I am incredibly stubborn ,so is my daughter and so is autism ~it doesn’t always end well .
I also am also realistic ,I knew that my daughter might not be able to handle it . I made a game plan .
I wanted Alyssa there ,the whole family was there and I wanted her there too .
I had my niece who was 7 be a second flower girl . That way she could help guide Alyssa . Also If Alyssa refused or melted down we still had a flower girl .
I hired a teacher from her school to come and help with her . She could take her out if it was too much without disrupting the wedding .
She wore the dress and walked down the aisle and it meant everything to me 💙
We truly didnt know what would happen . She did it and If I didn’t try and let fear dictate I would of lost out . It’s not always easy but it’s so important to try.
The experiences help them learn to tolerate the environment. It takes time but they do learn and it gets easier .